Need some good old-fashioned espionage sorting out, but don’t have access to a drone or a two-way mirror? Pete Donaldson is now available for hire!

He’s joined by Luke and Jim in a suspicious room full of cameras and microphones to talk about pre-season happenings and fresh outcry about the possibility of Premier League matches overseas. Meanwhile, there are fishcake protests in Norway and – at long last – a proper punch in a football match. Plus, you won't find a better durian-based fact on any other podcast than this one today. Guaranteed. So come join us!

We're back on stage and tickets are out NOW! Join us at London Palladium on Friday September 20th 2024 for 'Football Ramble: Time Tunnel', a journey through football history like no other. Expect loads of laughs, all your Ramble favourites, and absolutely everything on Pete's USB stick. Get your tickets at footballramblelive.com!

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Arsenal recently made Alexander Isak their top priority transfer target again after failing to sign Benjamin Sesko.

Although the Gunners are also being linked with moves for players like Victor Osimhen and Viktor Gyökeres, recent reports indicate they have shifted their focus to Isak.

In his two seasons in the Premier League, the Swede has proven to be one of the best strikers in Europe and has been a key player for Newcastle United.

Isak is on the radar of every top club in England, and Newcastle quoted £115 million to Chelsea when the Blues wanted to sign him earlier in the year.

That fee is too high for Arsenal, who cannot afford to pay it now.

If Edu and Mikel Arteta needed more motivation to sign Pedro Neto, Wolves manager Gary O’Neil has just given them one. Some Arsenal fans hope that the club will finally sign a Bukayo Saka deputy who is of a similar level. Saka has played a lot in recent years, possibly more than he should have if we are being honest.

.The Hale End graduate is a one-of-a-kind right winger for both Arsenal and England. Unfortunately, no one at Arsenal has come close to matching what he brings from the right side of the attack. And the problem is that he wants to play every single game, and he can be a game-winner even if he’s having a bad day.

. It is obvious that Arsenal should invest in the transfer market to acquire an ideal Saka deputy that is at the same level, so Arteta would feel comfortable to be just as dangerous as our starboy.

Wolves’ Portuguese international, Neto, is one of the few wingers that a lot of Gooners have agreed can perform at Saka’s level. That’s why we were anxious the other day that Spurs would beat us to the deal.

That said, while acknowledging that Neto would undoubtedly be a success on any team he joins, Gary O’Neil has stated that they will not stand in the way of the Portuguese winger if a reasonable offer is made for his services. He also mentioned that no club had approached them about the deal, but even if they hope to keep the player before deadline day, a suitor could come forward for his signature.

Mikel Arteta spent at least three years as the assistant manager of Manchester City, and his playing style at Arsenal is notably influenced by his time there.

Having worked closely with Pep Guardiola, Arteta built strong relationships with many players at City, which facilitated the signings of Gabriel Jesus and Oleksandr Zinchenko for Arsenal.

The Gunners continue to be linked with moves for several City players and are expected to target more in the future.

The latest City star on Arsenal’s radar is Julian Alvarez, who recently expressed concerns about his lack of game time at the Etihad.

Alvarez often plays second fiddle to Erling Haaland, and the Argentinian forward might consider leaving City, having already won all the top club trophies with them.

Aside from the LCM issue, there was one other issue with Arsenal last season: over-reliance on certain players, such as Bukayo Saka and Martin Odegaard. But could Ethan Nwaneri be the solution to reducing the duo’s reliance?

Many anticipate that Nwaneri, one of the Hale End talents, will have a strong season in 2024–25 and that his time has come to join the first squad. He was one of the first names on Arsenal’s pre-season tour list and went on to impress against Premier League opponents in the United States.

Arteta tried him out at LCM, and the 17-year-old performed admirably. He accepted a great deal of responsibility as a creator while also possessing the toughness and physicality required at LCM.

One could want him to stay at LCM, but with Mikel Merino on the way and Declan Rice’s ability to play there, LCM next season will be in excellent hands.

However, the Odegaard and Saka backup roles may be available, and I believe Nwaneri is equally as capable as Saka. He has played as an 8, a 10, a right winger, a left winger, a centre forward, and a second striker for Arsenal Youth.

Arsenal’s Preseason Tour Justifies Arteta’s Transfer Priorities by Eric

Arsenal Football Club has just completed a relatively successful pre-season tour and jetted back to England. Although the best single aspect of the tour is that we made it through with all our projected first XI in good health (or out resting), the Liverpool game drove home some fundamental truths that justify Arteta’s transfer priorities.

Oleksandr Zinchenko was skinned alive in the run-up to Liverpool’s first goal. Yes, he was guarding Mo Salah, who is a difficult cover for anyone. However, the minute Liverpool played that ball into space and forced Zinchenko into a foot race, there was no other way that play was going to end except with us picking the ball up out of the net.

It’s not just a lack of pace that hampers Zinchenko, it’s a lack of understanding of the angles he needs to take in pursuit once he’s beaten. His deficiencies at LB are glaring and it’s easy to understand why. He’s not a natural LB. He isn’t even a natural defender. He’s playing that position as a tactical adjustment from the manager, an adjustment that brings strengths and weaknesses.

The strength of the inverted FB is that it gives Arsenal an extra body in possession to ping the ball off while we try to dominate the football. But when the player in the inverted position is Zinchenko, he will always be under threat from the pacy wingers that populate EPL rosters. Enter Riccardo Calafiori.

TODD BOEHLY AND HIS SPENDING SPREE by Ken 1945

I came across this article on Facebook and found these incredible figures along with two facts.

1. Since the American billionaire took over Chelsea (20th June 2022), the Blues have not won a single trophy.

2. They have spent nearly twice as much money on transfers as any other side in world football.

Here are the figures that were produced by “Livescore” and they are in euros :

It turns out Arsenal is still very interested in Victor Osimhen, despite what we previously believed. So, there was some news about Chelsea potentially signing Osimhen on loan while negotiating Lukaku’s move to Napoli. That made us wonder if Arsenal ever had any interest in the Nigerian striker. If they did, it would be strange that they would let him join Chelsea on loan, especially since they could have made a similar deal themselves.

According to Corriere Dello Sport, it seems that Arsenal has renewed their interest in the Serie A striker. Arsenal has been a fan of Osimhen for quite some time, and they definitely don’t want to see him go to Stamford Bridge.

It’s actually quite interesting that the player himself, according to that report, doesn’t see Chelsea as his first choice for his next club. Considering the hefty £110 million release clause, it might seem downright impossible to entertain the idea of signing Osimhen on a permanent deal.

However, there’s some positive news about that swoop. Napoli is actually open to letting the hitman go and is considering loan offers for the player. A loan deal is definitely within Arsenal’s budget. In fact, the successful loan deal with David Raya should give them some encouragement that they can bring Osimhen on board and see if he’s the right fit for them next season.

Surely, whether you’re a fan or not, bringing Osimhen on loan could be a fantastic transfer opportunity for Arsenal. It’s definitely something they shouldn’t overlook, don’t you think?

Marseille’s insistence on signing Eddie Nketiah in this transfer window looks like it will pay off, as the French club seems extremely keen to make him their Number Nine, but it appears that Arteta and Edu are still nowhere near agreeing with OM on the terms of the deal.

With Roberto de Zerbi as the coach now, Marseille expects to challenge for the French Ligue 1 title this season and it is natural that he wants to do his shopping in the Premier League, and of course Arsenal and Marseille have a great recent history of doing business that has worked out for the French giants.

But it seems that yet again, they have not matched Arsenal’s terms, as Fabrizio Romano revealed in his Daily Breifing on CaughtOffside this morning:… Arsenal reject a new proposal from Olympique Marseille for Eddie Nketiah. Understand the proposal is in the region of €27m but was still considered not enough to let Eddie leave. OM agreed personal terms with Nketiah but still no agreement with the Gunners.

Sometimes I just wish Arsenal could finalise all their transfer deals earlier, especially as it was suggested this morning that Arsenal simply cannot confirm any new arrivals at the club until it is certain that our sales are going through.

This makes sense of course as we can only have so many players in our squad, but why do I keep getting this niggling worry that everyone will be trying to argue about every penny right up until the final hour of the transfer window?

The Arsenal US pre-season tour has made it clear that Ethan Nwaneri and Myles Lewis-Skelly are the ones who will shape the future of Arsenal. They have proven themselves to be more than capable against Premier League opposition.

In the upcoming 2024–25 season, Mikel Arteta should fully integrate them into his first-team squad. The Hale End duo’s impressive pre-season performances against Bournemouth, Manchester United, and Liverpool indicate that they will quickly establish themselves as full-fledged first-team players.

While some may disagree, the two young players are fully prepared. Fans should be excited to see what they can bring to the table.
Nwaneri is a versatile attacking player who can step in for Odegaard or Saka when needed, and he’s also capable of playing as an LCM against teams that employ a low block.

As Arteta said at the end of our USA tour about the youngsters that had joined the squad: “I’m really pleased with all of them. Unfortunately, I wanted to give opportunities to all of them, but we didn’t have enough time to do so, but especially the ones that played, I think they performed & responded incredibly well.

“So that’s something that we take from the tour as well, that we have a lot of talent there that we want to use & they show that they are very much pushing to earn the right to play with us.”

Arsenal fans will definitely be having mixed feelings now that Emile Smith-Rwe’s transfer to Fulham has been confirmed. midfielder made his first team debut in September 2018, when he came on as a substitute in our 4-2 win against Vorskla Poltava, creating history as the first player born in the 2000s to debut for the club.

After a couple of very positive loans with RB Leipzig and Huddersfield, he was welcomed to the Arsenal first team alongside Bukayo Saka.

During The Gunners 2021/22 season Smith-Rowe was a beacon of light as an academy graduate enduring nearly 2,000 minutes of Premier League game time and 33 matches too in which he scored ten times with two assists to his name.

Since then the injury struck youngster has failed to cement his position in perhaps the best Arsenal team since the 2003/04 Invincible’s team.

Despite being plagued by injury in recent times the Englishman is still regarded as one of the most promising youngsters in the Premiership who could certainly benefit a mid-table side like Fulham and I would think that if he can stay fit he would play just about every game next season.

The finale is here! And Pete brings perhaps the best episode of the lot for you today. We pick things up at the start of April, where barns were burning everywhere, Nottingham Forest’s X admin was setting fire to bridges everywhere, and the Premier League approached its exciting conclusion.

And don’t forget some memorable s**thousery overseas – from suspicious activity in Hungary’s U14s league, to a Dutch referee officiating a game and then lifting the title for one of the teams. All that and much more on today’s final Football Ramble Best Of 2023/24!

We're back on stage and tickets are out NOW! Join us at London Palladium on Friday September 20th 2024 for 'Football Ramble: Time Tunnel', a journey through football history like no other. Expect loads of laughs, all your Ramble favourites, and absolutely everything on Pete's USB stick. Get your tickets at footballramblelive.com!

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In case anyone is unsure, Sean Connery is in fact no longer with us. Are you paying attention Vish?

Pete’s back with another collection of the best moments from the 23/34 season. Today, we head into 2024 and revisit Jurgen Klopp announcing he was leaving Liverpool, Neil Warnock joining Aberdeen, and the time Sunderland slagged off one of their club legends. Oh and yes… Vish forgot Sean Connery had died, in case you hadn't noticed.

We're back on stage and tickets are out NOW! Join us at London Palladium on Friday September 20th 2024 for 'Football Ramble: Time Tunnel', a journey through football history like no other. Expect loads of laughs, all your Ramble favourites, and absolutely everything on Pete's USB stick. Get your tickets at footballramblelive.com!

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Your Chief Keystone Cop Pete Donaldson is back with more of our favourite moments from the season that was. Today, we’ve got Manchester United’s Champions League adventures, lard mafias from Horsham, and a heartwarming poem about Emi Martinez. Come join us!

We're back on stage and tickets are out NOW! Join us at London Palladium on Friday September 20th 2024 for 'Football Ramble: Time Tunnel', a journey through football history like no other. Expect loads of laughs, all your Ramble favourites, and absolutely everything on Pete's USB stick. Get your tickets at footballramblelive.com!

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The new club season is almost upon us! But before kick-off, we’re reliving our favourite moments from 2023/24.

Today, Pete takes you back to the opening months of the season which began with Harry Kane finally saying goodbye to Tottenham (after spending 4-6 hours in a north London safe house, of course). Meanwhile, we said hello to Mauricio Pochettino’s lemons, Jason Tindall and the PIF Posse. Oh, and the internet went into meltdown over VAR. Remember Tottenham vs Liverpool? Yeah… Listen to relive all that and more!

We're back on stage and tickets are out NOW! Join us at London Palladium on Friday September 20th 2024 for 'Football Ramble: Time Tunnel', a journey through football history like no other. Expect loads of laughs, all your Ramble favourites, and absolutely everything on Pete's USB stick. Get your tickets at footballramblelive.com!

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Before you listen to this episode, we want to set one thing straight: despite Pete’s accusations, Marcus does not smoke crack cocaine. All right? All right.

Marcus, Jim and Pete catch up with the world of club football and quickly remember why Harry Redknapp definitely still records Match of the Day on his YouView box. The FA continue their hunt for the next England manager, with Eddie Howe now taking centre stage – Marcus, though, still thinks they’ll hold out for Pep Guardiola! Plus, unconfirmed reports that the Saudis are willing to pay Oasis to get back together as well as cover Ederson’s £900,000-per-week wages…

We're back on stage and tickets are out NOW! Join us at London Palladium on Friday September 20th 2024 for 'Football Ramble: Time Tunnel', a journey through football history like no other. Expect loads of laughs, all your Ramble favourites, and absolutely everything on Pete's USB stick. Get your tickets at footballramblelive.com!

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Now it’s time for the painful bit. Join us for Part 2 of our Euro 2024 farewell, with all of our favourite moments from the Round of 16 and beyond! From Bukayo Saka’s penalty (and that smile), to Andy Carroll eating chicken off the floor outside a restaurant in Mayfair – it really was a tournament for the good guys. Until the end bit, obvs. 

Enjoy our highlights and - for one last time to England and Euro 2024 - it’s a fond Auf Wiedersehen. Apart from you, James Corden.

We're back on stage and tickets are out NOW! Join us at London Palladium on Friday September 20th 2024 for 'Football Ramble: Time Tunnel', a journey through football history like no other. Expect loads of laughs, all your Ramble favourites, and absolutely everything on Pete's USB stick. Get your tickets at footballramblelive.com!

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The groups stages were arguably the highlight of Euro 2024 - well, maybe not for England and Scotland. But we were blessed with some exciting football and introduced to some amazing new characters. Like... Big Mama UEFA and (even bigger) Martin Ádám.

Join us to relive some of our favourite moments from the Euros group stages, including Cristiano Ronaldo transforming into prime Niall Quinn and the outbreak of food wars across Germany. Oh and who could forget Mark Lawrenson's big moment. Have a listen and keep the fever alive…

…Mossad. Make sure to join us tomorrow for Part 2!

We're back on stage and tickets are out NOW! Join us at London Palladium on Friday September 20th 2024 for 'Football Ramble: Time Tunnel', a journey through football history like no other. Expect loads of laughs, all your Ramble favourites, and absolutely everything on Pete's USB stick. Get your tickets at footballramblelive.com!

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After four tournaments, two finals, a collection of excellent waistcoats and one flare up the arse, Gareth Southgate’s time as England manager is over. Today Marcus, Luke and Jim are here to reflect on what Southgate’s legacy will be once the dust has settled.

There's also the question of who comes next? Marcus explains why Eddie Howe might just have an advantage over Graham Potter in the race to become the next England manager. That advantage of course goes by the name of Jason Tindall…

We're back on stage and tickets are out NOW! Join us at London Palladium on Friday September 20th 2024 for 'Football Ramble: Time Tunnel', a journey through football history like no other. Expect loads of laughs, all your Ramble favourites, and absolutely everything on Pete's USB stick. Get your tickets at footballramblelive.com!

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How do you get over England losing a Euros final? Relive all your misplaced optimism before the tournament, of course! 

Marcus, Luke, Andy and Jim reveal their pre-tournament predictions for Euro 2024 – featuring a wild prediction for Spain, a bare Scottish bot-bot, and the return of Big Mama UEFA. Stay tuned to discover which Rambler was a very surprising winner…

We're back on stage and tickets are out NOW! Join us at London Palladium on Friday September 20th 2024 for 'Football Ramble: Time Tunnel', a journey through football history like no other. Expect loads of laughs, all your Ramble favourites, and absolutely everything on Pete's USB stick. Get your tickets at footballramblelive.com!

Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..

Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.